"YOU CHANGED MY LIFE!" I received this comment from an
employee of an International Airline company at a trade show. She was an attendee at one of my
Corporate Speaking Engagements. I was at a hotel and she spotted me
and was ecstatic to share that comment as I parted one of the rooms. I smiled
and said, "Thank You. Keep going forward on your newfound journey." One of the greatest feelings on earth is having your name appear in
someone's life story/testimonial as the person who helped someone get on a better life
track. A powerful "feeling" came over me as I sauntered down the hall and out of
the hotel.
I pondered this as I walked away. She gave me the credit when in
fact I did not do most of the work! She did. It also brought back memories of a
young man who was suicidal and he came to see me in counseling as his plan to end his life was
in place. This was one of those unique times when a helper was in the right place at the right time. Rope in a tree; bricks on the wharf in the harbour; J in the fetal position that day with two plans to end all the mental anguish and psychological pain (two plans in case the first did not work). He could barely speak. The suicidal thoughts were coming fast and furious by the minute. I did a professional intervention and kept him in my office for two hours. We talked and he cried the whole time. "The tears the eyes don't shed, the organs feel" as the saying goes. He let it all flow out. I also called his family so they knew and could come and pick him up. He promised me that he would not harm himself and that he would come and see me the next day. This spark of hope sunk in. Sure enough he came to see me the next morning. It was a rough night. The years of abuse, neglect and knockdowns had finally come to a halt that evening. He went to the woods where he had tied on the rope, but he fell to his knees as he knew he could not end his life after promising me that he would come and see me the next morning. It was so close, yet the right chance meeting at the right time can change everything for a person. In my office, he told me how he just fell to his knees in tears as I had given him hope, something to live for. It was then I introduced him to the field of Personal Development.
This was tough work for him, being down and out, wanting to end it all. Yet he
pulled through. He went to work on himself. Daily. Searching, reading books and
getting involved in the community (bit by bit and little by little) gave him a purpose to get out of bed in the
morning. When he was strong enough, a few months later, I gave him the message
he needed for further reinforcement. I told him "You did most of the work!" I
was just the spark to help start his fire. He agreed and his self-esteem soared
once again. Today J is gainfully employed, in a relationship, has completed several speaking programs including Toastmasters and has started to write a book. An amazing story of resilience and an amazing story of the mystery of life unfolding as it does. We never know the impact we can have in helping others get back on their feet. And we never know what people we may meet who need a life spark in order for them to bouce back to a better reality. My grandfather, Skipper Michael Joseph Bruce was right: "Helping people out is what life is really all about." Be a spark today, and always. Help someone light their fire and help another to burn even brighter. PMW
Monday 7 April 2014
Wednesday 20 March 2013
Contrarian Fish-Nuggets March 20, 2013
A few hump-day nuggets to chew on and digest as you push ahead this week:
1. Be a contrarian thinker. Challenge the status quo. Learn to think differently than the herd. Be someone who helps push the human race forward, not someone scared of what others may say. One of the ways to do this is to "walk your facebook quotes talk." If you post something, go live it in reality.
2. Do something that scares all the living protoplasm inside you. Bungee jump. Zip-line. Sky-dive. Speak in front of 10,000 people! Just go do it and see what you are really made of.
3. Speak Out. Do not be afraid to challenge people in meetings and at work with your ideas. The insecure "yes people" will not like it, but in the big picture it is not about them anyway. Their life philosophy is distorted and it is not your job to boost their self-esteem. So speak out from your heart and soul. As an example: The front line workers in fast food restaurants are often the ones with the best ideas, as the main goal is customer service. Management would be wise to listen to them, and in many cases they do.
4. The truth sets you free. Free to correct past mistakes. Free to make amends to people, and to life. Free to really pour it on and live. If you are unhealthy, look in the mirror and confirm this. Then go to work to change it...or not. The choice is always up to you.
5. Stay in tune with technology. It will be the main way that you communicate with your grandkids in the not so distant future! Learn a new computer skill or program ASAP.
6. Solve problems before they ever present themselves. This means take your past experiences and life-long learning and apply/invest them to anticipate the challenges ahead. Thus, prevention is the key. Pay attention to the canaries in the coal mine so they do not become disasters.
7. It is often hard to change your thoughts. Yet we hear "change your thoughts, change your life" and other such cliches. This is fine but sometimes not possible. Often we need a jolt of energy to switch our thinking. Nothing happens until something moves. Get active and exercise, let action be your spark. When you feel good, then you can change the distorted thoughts. Emotion is best created from motion...so get moving!
And of course, "Keep Fishing!" Which really means keep at it, keep at it, keep at it...try a different approach, talk to people, reasearch, use your own intuitive mind and creativity UNTIL you get the results you want. Keep Fishing and always watch that bobber.
pmw
1. Be a contrarian thinker. Challenge the status quo. Learn to think differently than the herd. Be someone who helps push the human race forward, not someone scared of what others may say. One of the ways to do this is to "walk your facebook quotes talk." If you post something, go live it in reality.
2. Do something that scares all the living protoplasm inside you. Bungee jump. Zip-line. Sky-dive. Speak in front of 10,000 people! Just go do it and see what you are really made of.
3. Speak Out. Do not be afraid to challenge people in meetings and at work with your ideas. The insecure "yes people" will not like it, but in the big picture it is not about them anyway. Their life philosophy is distorted and it is not your job to boost their self-esteem. So speak out from your heart and soul. As an example: The front line workers in fast food restaurants are often the ones with the best ideas, as the main goal is customer service. Management would be wise to listen to them, and in many cases they do.
4. The truth sets you free. Free to correct past mistakes. Free to make amends to people, and to life. Free to really pour it on and live. If you are unhealthy, look in the mirror and confirm this. Then go to work to change it...or not. The choice is always up to you.
5. Stay in tune with technology. It will be the main way that you communicate with your grandkids in the not so distant future! Learn a new computer skill or program ASAP.
6. Solve problems before they ever present themselves. This means take your past experiences and life-long learning and apply/invest them to anticipate the challenges ahead. Thus, prevention is the key. Pay attention to the canaries in the coal mine so they do not become disasters.
7. It is often hard to change your thoughts. Yet we hear "change your thoughts, change your life" and other such cliches. This is fine but sometimes not possible. Often we need a jolt of energy to switch our thinking. Nothing happens until something moves. Get active and exercise, let action be your spark. When you feel good, then you can change the distorted thoughts. Emotion is best created from motion...so get moving!
And of course, "Keep Fishing!" Which really means keep at it, keep at it, keep at it...try a different approach, talk to people, reasearch, use your own intuitive mind and creativity UNTIL you get the results you want. Keep Fishing and always watch that bobber.
pmw
Sunday 10 March 2013
Fish, Don't Wish!
We can relate all aspects of life to fishing. You can relate your passion to almost any life aspect as well. I heard Business Philosopher Jim Rohn once say: "Plant, don't chant" (meaning to plant seeds for success like you would plant a garden and get to work to make life happen versus following a ritual such chanting under a pyramid to some 5000 year old guru to bring you luck and abundance).
It makes sense.
Thus, I say "FISH, don't wish." Get busy, get your line in the water, and get out there! You cannot "catch" with inactivity. This means: no activity means, no energy or no weight loss; no goals means no accomplishment; no planning means failing. And of course, no fishing means no fish! So here it is in simple form: get your fly/lure/hook in the water and take action. How are you doing on that idea?
It makes sense.
Thus, I say "FISH, don't wish." Get busy, get your line in the water, and get out there! You cannot "catch" with inactivity. This means: no activity means, no energy or no weight loss; no goals means no accomplishment; no planning means failing. And of course, no fishing means no fish! So here it is in simple form: get your fly/lure/hook in the water and take action. How are you doing on that idea?
Wednesday 27 February 2013
The Countdown is ON! But beware...
My salmon fishing buddies and I are now anxiously awaiting the start of the 2013 fly-fishing quest for atlantic salmon, here in Eastern Canada. The big day is June 1, only 93 days away (but who is really counting!). What are you so passionate about, that you get excited about counting down the days? A vacation? Wedding? Business trip? Start of major league baseball?
Whatever the case, we must all be careful of wishing our lives away. I did this about 10 years ago. Being over-excited about the upcoming salmon fishing season, I put all of my extra energy outside of work into planning, planning and planning for the salmon season of a lifetime. The result was not so good: I neglected my health, was stressed out (due to not enough self-care), suffered depression in the months that followed and it was my worst year ever (many rivers also closed due to low water levels). Anticipation is a great motivator, but do not lose sight of day to day living for the sake of something that may never come to pass.
After that experience, I woke up and realized that the time will come soon enough; there is no need to wish life away so fast. Secondly, health is number one and everything must be in balance (even our hobbies, passions and life motivators need to be kept in check). Sometimes we can put soooooo much energy and effort in and as a result, tip the stress scale to the negative point of no return. Lastly, because of that experience, I studied work-life balance in a major way. We can not be experts without going through the pain, struggles and tribulations on our own...no matter how many letters we place after our names. And of course, with every set back, comes an opportunity. What unpredictable situations have you learned life-lessons from?
Let the countdown begin ... but let life unfold as it should. There is no rushing mother nature, or time, anyway.
pmw
Whatever the case, we must all be careful of wishing our lives away. I did this about 10 years ago. Being over-excited about the upcoming salmon fishing season, I put all of my extra energy outside of work into planning, planning and planning for the salmon season of a lifetime. The result was not so good: I neglected my health, was stressed out (due to not enough self-care), suffered depression in the months that followed and it was my worst year ever (many rivers also closed due to low water levels). Anticipation is a great motivator, but do not lose sight of day to day living for the sake of something that may never come to pass.
After that experience, I woke up and realized that the time will come soon enough; there is no need to wish life away so fast. Secondly, health is number one and everything must be in balance (even our hobbies, passions and life motivators need to be kept in check). Sometimes we can put soooooo much energy and effort in and as a result, tip the stress scale to the negative point of no return. Lastly, because of that experience, I studied work-life balance in a major way. We can not be experts without going through the pain, struggles and tribulations on our own...no matter how many letters we place after our names. And of course, with every set back, comes an opportunity. What unpredictable situations have you learned life-lessons from?
Let the countdown begin ... but let life unfold as it should. There is no rushing mother nature, or time, anyway.
pmw
Sunday 10 February 2013
To Do Lists often Don't!
Time management and life management are quite a challenge these days. Though I believe in making lists, especially while goal setting, if I had to make these daily for the tasks I need to accomplish, I would spend more time making lists than actually living. Let's see, what I would have to write down daily/weekly: exercise/gym, read 15-30 mins of inspiration, work 8:30-4:30 (with a whole lot of appointments in there!), work on my business in the evenings, write blogs and articles to be published, tie some flies (each night), toastmasters, cleaning, grocery store, email responses, facebook and social media posts (self promotion is necessary), balance bizness books, ebay sales (flyfishing and books), stretch daily and go to chirporactor appointments, visit my nephew/family/friends weekly...and the list goes on. Not only that, but I do not have kids and I do not watch tv...and I did not include any speaking engagements! Time management and to do lists are OK but if you want a real focus on a new life habit, call it Life Management.
Here are a few ideas for a new system:
1. Everything in balance, as much as possible (to much list making can be hazardous to your health!)
2. Major in majors - get rid of TV; only put your top 3-5 daily things that you MUST do on a list.
3. Focus on your BIG end results and what you want.
4. Think of WHY you want the results you want (new career, new house, better relationship...). Purpose is a powerful motivator and the engine that will drive you to achieve and feel fulfilled.
5. Think daily, of your big life goals and dreams (visualize these when you wake up and when you go to bed) and why you want them: what will they really do for you and "your world"? Use reasons and purpose as a major motivator to drive you forward to attract and catch what you want.
When you focus daily on the majors and why you want them, the small daily actions will take care of themselves, list or no list. Go fishing now, with a new approach: less list making, but with more major items and stronger reasons of why you want what you want. Add an emotional daily touch to your thinking and watch what your new approach will catch.
pmw
Here are a few ideas for a new system:
1. Everything in balance, as much as possible (to much list making can be hazardous to your health!)
2. Major in majors - get rid of TV; only put your top 3-5 daily things that you MUST do on a list.
3. Focus on your BIG end results and what you want.
4. Think of WHY you want the results you want (new career, new house, better relationship...). Purpose is a powerful motivator and the engine that will drive you to achieve and feel fulfilled.
5. Think daily, of your big life goals and dreams (visualize these when you wake up and when you go to bed) and why you want them: what will they really do for you and "your world"? Use reasons and purpose as a major motivator to drive you forward to attract and catch what you want.
When you focus daily on the majors and why you want them, the small daily actions will take care of themselves, list or no list. Go fishing now, with a new approach: less list making, but with more major items and stronger reasons of why you want what you want. Add an emotional daily touch to your thinking and watch what your new approach will catch.
pmw
Thursday 31 January 2013
Life is all about the sharing
Share
Your story, plus with Compliments: Fishing For Reality eBook!
How would you like to receive a complimentary copy of Fishing For Reality eBook? Fishing For Reality is Newfoundland and Labrador, Canada’s, first ever published “self-help” book with lessons of wisdom from the ages. The goal of this book is two-fold: to share culturally authentic “life-fishing” ideas and in the process add to the readers’ life-long learning journey. Simple, thought provoking and easy to read, Fishing For Reality is user friendly and loaded with stories and nuggets of truth about life, about people and about reality - for you the reader. This book will take you on a personal journey and show you how to better lead your life ship in our uncertain world of accelerated change.
How would you like to receive a complimentary copy of Fishing For Reality eBook? Fishing For Reality is Newfoundland and Labrador, Canada’s, first ever published “self-help” book with lessons of wisdom from the ages. The goal of this book is two-fold: to share culturally authentic “life-fishing” ideas and in the process add to the readers’ life-long learning journey. Simple, thought provoking and easy to read, Fishing For Reality is user friendly and loaded with stories and nuggets of truth about life, about people and about reality - for you the reader. This book will take you on a personal journey and show you how to better lead your life ship in our uncertain world of accelerated change.
So
I'm guessing you're asking "how do I get it, Paul?" Simple, just go
to the link I've provided below, and it's yours totally F.R.E.E!!!
Why am I giving away such a great resource? Well, it’s an easy choice for me, really.
It's a great way for me to introduce you to a new project I'm part of (and I'm inviting you to be part too). I’m in the process of collecting YOUR Fishing lessons, stories, tips, quotes and ideas for my new book called Lessons >From Fishing. Think of it as Chicken Soup For The Soul type book, with incredible and inspiring Fishing stories, strategies, quotes and tips.
So … do you have a Fishing lesson, story, tip, quote or idea to share? I’d love to hear it! Please include anything from fly-fishing to ice-fishing to tuna fishing and everything else fishing related. Also feel free to submit one than one contribution! Oh, and you will be acknowledged and credited in the book for your contribution.
Now whether you share your story, tip, and/or strategy – or not – I still want you to download the Fishing For Reality eBook with my compliments! Feel free to send this to your friends and/or fishing colleagues as well so they can contribute.
Simply click here to receive your f.r.e.e. copy of Fishing For Reality! After which, you'll have access to my Story Submissions page, where I would love for you to share your best Fishing tip, story, and/or strategy. Just fill out the easy, quick submission page, and you're done. That’s it!
I look forward to hearing about your Fishing experiences. Thanks for your help!
Paul Michael White
PS. This is powerful book that I normally sell, so make sure and take advantage of this special Gift.
PPS. Once I get all the Fishing stories, tips and ideas to fill the Lessons From Fishing book, this offer will be closed. It’s available only for a limited time, so don’t delay! To receive your F.R.E.E. download and/or to submit your story today, click here.
Why am I giving away such a great resource? Well, it’s an easy choice for me, really.
It's a great way for me to introduce you to a new project I'm part of (and I'm inviting you to be part too). I’m in the process of collecting YOUR Fishing lessons, stories, tips, quotes and ideas for my new book called Lessons >From Fishing. Think of it as Chicken Soup For The Soul type book, with incredible and inspiring Fishing stories, strategies, quotes and tips.
So … do you have a Fishing lesson, story, tip, quote or idea to share? I’d love to hear it! Please include anything from fly-fishing to ice-fishing to tuna fishing and everything else fishing related. Also feel free to submit one than one contribution! Oh, and you will be acknowledged and credited in the book for your contribution.
Now whether you share your story, tip, and/or strategy – or not – I still want you to download the Fishing For Reality eBook with my compliments! Feel free to send this to your friends and/or fishing colleagues as well so they can contribute.
Simply click here to receive your f.r.e.e. copy of Fishing For Reality! After which, you'll have access to my Story Submissions page, where I would love for you to share your best Fishing tip, story, and/or strategy. Just fill out the easy, quick submission page, and you're done. That’s it!
I look forward to hearing about your Fishing experiences. Thanks for your help!
Paul Michael White
PS. This is powerful book that I normally sell, so make sure and take advantage of this special Gift.
PPS. Once I get all the Fishing stories, tips and ideas to fill the Lessons From Fishing book, this offer will be closed. It’s available only for a limited time, so don’t delay! To receive your F.R.E.E. download and/or to submit your story today, click here.
Wednesday 30 January 2013
Facebook (and online depression)
You knew it was coming and maybe it is here deeper than we think; only
science can confirm this new phenomenon. Let’s call it Facebook Depression and it
makes sense: people are suffering low moods and more life drama due to Facebook
… or is it really due to Facebook?! Isn't it always the people who are responsible,
not necessarily the program, or machine, or technology? For example, regarding
addictions, the addictive tendency seems to be in the person and not the choice
of addiction such as gambling or drugs. Thus the word responsibility is used in
a positive fashion to help people take power over their lives and seek help.
Someone recently commented on their Facebook status that they need AA for
Facebook!
So here are some contrarian ideas to stir your thinking, and that is my ultimate
goal: to help you help yourself. No one has all the answers, but with a right mix from different sources we can all help in the solution process. The key is to mix my ideas with someone else’s, and your own, and come to
your own conclusions about what you want in YOUR life. Tony Robbins called this
“Personal Power.” Make this a time when you take your Personal Power and live as
you wish to live.
Rhianna sings:
It's a thief in the night to come and grab you
It can creep up inside you and consume you
A disease of the mind, it can control you
It's too close for comfort. Quite a unique way to describe a mental illness! “Disturbia.” Many have felt disturbed while on Facebook. On one hand we have the comments and posts about how rotten life is and how someone cannot get a break (make a choice now and DELETE this poison from your life) and how we will all be dead by the end of 2013. If you decide to keep these people on your Facebook, do what I do and say a prayer for them: “Thank GOD I am ME and not living in their shoes.” If you continue to follow their posts and negative energy, we can bet that you will suffer Facebook Depression or some sort of low mood just by being influenced (putting those thoughts in your mind) by the words in front of you. On the other side of the coin are the Facebook posts that announce life is too perfect. We all know the reality: beauty is in the eye of the beholder and thus we must strive to see the good in all, even the adversities. These people have their moments of despair and sadness too; it’s just that they do not announce it to the world. Those who may suffer Facebook Depression are more than likely playing the game of the Jones’ and comparing themselves to others successes. When we compare ourselves to others, what our little competitive devil on the left shoulder (if you are left handed
) wants us to do, we will always play a
losing game. We are not better or worse, just different. Why play those self-imposed games
anyway? They are definitely a result of our egos seeking attention and drama …
and ultimately pain.
Some people prefer to stay inside on the week nights and weekends and see what everyone else is doing - on Facebook. Is technology to blame? NO. Once again the answer lies in the problem – the people and their habits. Facebook does not suffer depression … Facebook does not even suffer recession, or compression or obsession or any other human-session. It is the people using Facebook (and other sociasl media), that have the challenges. A student once told me that “all problems are solvable if and when we go looking for solutions.” So here are some ideas for consideration, to keep you healthy, on Facebook (or any other social-technology):
I hope these ideas have stirred some of your own ideas. Choose wisely and learn to follow your own compass. Facebook Depression seems like another way to label and blame something on the outside for what is really happening on the inside. And depression is a part of like; seek help when the need arises ... and of course, everything (including Facebook) in moderation.
Paul
It can creep up inside you and consume you
A disease of the mind, it can control you
It's too close for comfort. Quite a unique way to describe a mental illness! “Disturbia.” Many have felt disturbed while on Facebook. On one hand we have the comments and posts about how rotten life is and how someone cannot get a break (make a choice now and DELETE this poison from your life) and how we will all be dead by the end of 2013. If you decide to keep these people on your Facebook, do what I do and say a prayer for them: “Thank GOD I am ME and not living in their shoes.” If you continue to follow their posts and negative energy, we can bet that you will suffer Facebook Depression or some sort of low mood just by being influenced (putting those thoughts in your mind) by the words in front of you. On the other side of the coin are the Facebook posts that announce life is too perfect. We all know the reality: beauty is in the eye of the beholder and thus we must strive to see the good in all, even the adversities. These people have their moments of despair and sadness too; it’s just that they do not announce it to the world. Those who may suffer Facebook Depression are more than likely playing the game of the Jones’ and comparing themselves to others successes. When we compare ourselves to others, what our little competitive devil on the left shoulder (if you are left handed
) wants us to do, we will always play a
losing game. We are not better or worse, just different. Why play those self-imposed games
anyway? They are definitely a result of our egos seeking attention and drama …
and ultimately pain. Some people prefer to stay inside on the week nights and weekends and see what everyone else is doing - on Facebook. Is technology to blame? NO. Once again the answer lies in the problem – the people and their habits. Facebook does not suffer depression … Facebook does not even suffer recession, or compression or obsession or any other human-session. It is the people using Facebook (and other sociasl media), that have the challenges. A student once told me that “all problems are solvable if and when we go looking for solutions.” So here are some ideas for consideration, to keep you healthy, on Facebook (or any other social-technology):
- Ask yourself “Why am I on Facebook?” Be honest. Are you there for
networking? Business? Family connection?
Set your own parameters when you have the answer. I believe it is a great way to
connect with the world, and the people we share it with. Of course we must be
cautious while using Facebook, yet at the same time let others be and follow
their own compass. Live YOUR life and your life only.
- Do you spend too much time on Facebook. It is a great procrastination mechanism, so be careful in this regard.
- Are you spending more time on Facebook than with your kids, family,
significant others or friends? This is where technology can be dangerous, but
once again it is the individual’s choice to spend time with loved ones or time
“creeping” as it is called in Facebook language. The greatest gift we can give
another, and ourselves, is time together.
- While on Facebook, are you jealous/envious of others successes or how they look?
Many will see this as an opportunity to shoot arrows at people and pick holes in
their tapestry. I guess the idea that ‘by knocking someone else down we think we
build ourselves up’ holds true in some people’s minds. However, this is a false
idea. The law of sowing and reaping offers this gem of wisdom: we get what we
set. Eventually we must sow positive seeds if we want positive results.
- Be careful what pictures you post – they could end up anywhere! Set your
privacy settings, especially this day in age, to protect you.
- If you are a parent, limit your children’s time spent on Facebook. This
holds true when statistics reveal that kids are significantly more obese and
unhealthy than previous generations. I remember in my youth, playing street hockey until
midnight sometimes as we had a street light under our playing area. Can anyone
relate? Get your kids active as much as possible.
- Do not pay too much attention to people’s negative posts or read into them,
especially if they are personal. Treat your energy like money and invest it
wisely.
- Use Facebook to keep in contact with people, especially family that are
living away, and keep updated on their pictures. A picture is worth more than a
thousand words!
- Take personal responsibility and do not blame Facebook for anything. If you
find it negative or “causing” you a period of low moods, remember it is your own
perceptions, choices and actions that are really creating this. Change how you
view and use Facebook.
- See point #1 again – WHY are you using Facebook? The answer may reveal
itself and solve some of your other problems.
- If you do suffer what we have labelled Facebook Depression, then it may be time to seek professional help or delete your account and use your time in a much better fashion.
I hope these ideas have stirred some of your own ideas. Choose wisely and learn to follow your own compass. Facebook Depression seems like another way to label and blame something on the outside for what is really happening on the inside. And depression is a part of like; seek help when the need arises ... and of course, everything (including Facebook) in moderation.
Paul
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