Contrarian Fish-Nuggets March 20, 2013

A few hump-day nuggets to chew on and digest as you push ahead this week:

1. Be a contrarian thinker.  Challenge the status quo.  Learn to think differently than the herd.  Be someone who helps push the human race forward, not someone scared of what others may say.  One of the ways to do this is to "walk your facebook quotes talk."  If you post something, go live it in reality.
2. Do something that scares all the living protoplasm inside you.  Bungee jump. Zip-line. Sky-dive. Speak in front of 10,000 people!  Just go do it and see what you are really made of.
3. Speak Out.  Do not be afraid to challenge people in meetings and at work with your ideas.  The insecure "yes people" will not like it, but in the big picture it is not about them anyway.  Their life philosophy is distorted and it is not your job to boost their self-esteem.  So speak out from your heart and soul.  As an example:  The front line workers in fast food restaurants are often the ones with the best ideas, as the main goal is customer service.  Management would be wise to listen to them, and in many cases they do. 
4. The truth sets you free.  Free to correct past mistakes.  Free to make amends to people, and to life.  Free to really pour it on and live.  If you are unhealthy, look in the mirror and confirm this.  Then go to work to change it...or not.  The choice is always up to you.
5. Stay in tune with technology.  It will be the main way that you communicate with your grandkids in the not so distant future!  Learn a new computer skill or program ASAP.
6. Solve problems before they ever present themselves.  This means take your past experiences and life-long learning and apply/invest them to anticipate the challenges ahead.  Thus, prevention is the key.  Pay attention to the canaries in the coal mine so they do not become disasters.
7. It is often hard to change your thoughts.  Yet we hear "change your thoughts, change your life" and other such cliches.  This is fine but sometimes not possible.  Often we need a jolt of energy to switch our thinking.  Nothing happens until something moves.  Get active and exercise, let action be your spark.  When you feel good, then you can change the distorted thoughts.  Emotion is best created from motion...so get moving!

And of course, "Keep Fishing!"  Which really means keep at it, keep at it, keep at it...try a different approach, talk to people, reasearch, use your own intuitive mind and creativity UNTIL you get the results you want.  Keep Fishing and always watch that bobber.

pmw

Fish, Don't Wish!

We can relate all aspects of life to fishing.  You can relate your passion to almost any life aspect as well.  I heard Business Philosopher Jim Rohn once say: "Plant, don't chant" (meaning to plant seeds for success like you would plant a garden and get to work to make life happen versus following a ritual such chanting under a pyramid to some 5000 year old guru to bring you luck and abundance).
It makes sense.

Thus, I say "FISH, don't wish." Get busy, get your line in the water, and get out there!  You cannot "catch" with inactivity.  This means: no activity means, no energy or no weight loss; no goals means no accomplishment; no planning means failing.  And of course, no fishing means no fish!  So here it is in simple form: get your fly/lure/hook in the water and take action.  How are you doing on that idea?

The Countdown is ON! But beware...

My salmon fishing buddies and I are now anxiously awaiting the start of the 2013 fly-fishing quest for atlantic salmon, here in Eastern Canada.  The big day is June 1, only 93 days away (but who is really counting!).  What are you so passionate about, that you get excited about counting down the days?  A vacation? Wedding? Business trip? Start of major league baseball?

Whatever the case, we must all be careful of wishing our lives away.  I did this about 10 years ago.  Being over-excited about the upcoming salmon fishing season, I put all of my extra energy outside of work into planning, planning and planning for the salmon season of a lifetime.  The result was not so good: I neglected my health, was stressed out (due to not enough self-care), suffered depression in the months that followed and it was my worst year ever (many rivers also closed due to low water levels).  Anticipation is a great motivator, but do not lose sight of day to day living for the sake of something that may never come to pass.

After that experience, I woke up and realized that the time will come soon enough; there is no need to wish life away so fast.  Secondly, health is number one and everything must be in balance (even our hobbies, passions and life motivators need to be kept in check).  Sometimes we can put soooooo much energy and effort in and as a result, tip the stress scale to the negative point of no return.  Lastly, because of that experience, I studied work-life balance in a major way.  We can not be experts without going through the pain, struggles and tribulations on our own...no matter how many letters we place after our names.  And of course, with every set back, comes an opportunity.  What unpredictable situations have you learned life-lessons from?

Let the countdown begin ... but let life unfold as it should.  There is no rushing mother nature, or time, anyway.

pmw

To Do Lists often Don't!

Time management and life management are quite a challenge these days.  Though I believe in making lists, especially while goal setting, if I had to make these daily for the tasks I need to accomplish, I would spend more time making lists than actually living.  Let's see, what I would have to write down daily/weekly: exercise/gym, read 15-30 mins of inspiration, work 8:30-4:30 (with a whole lot of appointments in there!), work on my business in the evenings, write blogs and articles to be published, tie some flies (each night), toastmasters, cleaning, grocery store, email responses, facebook and social media posts (self promotion is necessary), balance bizness books, ebay sales (flyfishing and books), stretch daily and go to chirporactor appointments, visit my nephew/family/friends weekly...and the list goes on.  Not only that, but I do not have kids and I do not watch tv...and I did not include any speaking engagements! Time management and to do lists are OK but if you want a real focus on a new life habit, call it Life Management. 

Here are a few ideas for a new system:
1. Everything in balance, as much as possible (to much list making can be hazardous to your health!)
2. Major in majors - get rid of TV; only put your top 3-5 daily things that you MUST do on a list.
3. Focus on your BIG end results and what you want.
4. Think of WHY you want the results you want (new career, new house, better relationship...).  Purpose is a powerful motivator and the engine that will drive you to achieve and feel fulfilled.
5. Think daily, of your big life goals and dreams (visualize these when you wake up and when you go to bed) and why you want them: what will they really do for you and "your world"? Use reasons and purpose as a major motivator to drive you forward to attract and catch what you want.

When you focus daily on the majors and why you want them, the small daily actions will take care of themselves, list or no list.  Go fishing now, with a new approach: less list making, but with more major items and stronger reasons of why you want what you want.  Add an emotional daily touch to your thinking and watch what your new approach will catch.

pmw

Life is all about the sharing

Share Your story, plus with Compliments: Fishing For Reality eBook!

How would you like to receive a complimentary copy of Fishing For Reality eBook? Fishing For Reality is Newfoundland and Labrador, Canada’s, first ever published “self-help” book with lessons of wisdom from the ages.  The goal of this book is two-fold: to share culturally authentic “life-fishing” ideas and in the process add to the readers’ life-long learning journey.  Simple, thought provoking and easy to read, Fishing For Reality is user friendly and loaded with stories and nuggets of truth about life, about people and about reality - for you the reader.  This book will take you on a personal journey and show you how to better lead your life ship in our uncertain world of accelerated change.

So I'm guessing you're asking "how do I get it, Paul?" Simple, just go to the link I've provided below, and it's yours totally F.R.E.E!!!

Why am I giving away such a great resource? Well, it’s an easy choice for me, really.

It's a great way for me to introduce you to a new project I'm part of (and I'm inviting you to be part too). I’m in the process of collecting YOUR Fishing lessons, stories, tips, quotes and ideas for my new book called Lessons >From Fishing. Think of it as Chicken Soup For The Soul type book, with incredible and inspiring Fishing stories, strategies, quotes and tips.

So … do you have a Fishing lesson, story, tip, quote or idea to share? I’d love to hear it! Please include anything from fly-fishing to ice-fishing to tuna fishing and everything else fishing related.  Also feel free to submit one than one contribution! Oh, and you will be acknowledged and credited in the book for your contribution.

Now whether you share your story, tip, and/or strategy – or not – I still want you to download the Fishing For Reality eBook with my compliments!  Feel free to send this to your friends and/or fishing colleagues as well so they can contribute. 

Simply click here to receive your f.r.e.e. copy of Fishing For Reality! After which, you'll have access to my Story Submissions page, where I would love for you to share your best Fishing tip, story, and/or strategy. Just fill out the easy, quick submission page, and you're done. That’s it!

I look forward to hearing about your Fishing experiences. Thanks for your help!

Paul Michael White


PS. This is powerful book that I normally sell, so make sure and take advantage of this special Gift.

PPS. Once I get all the Fishing stories, tips and ideas to fill the Lessons From Fishing book, this offer will be closed. It’s available only for a limited time, so don’t delay! To receive your F.R.E.E. download and/or to submit your story today, click here.

 

Facebook (and online depression)

You knew it was coming and maybe it is here deeper than we think; only science can confirm this new phenomenon. Let’s call it Facebook Depression and it makes sense: people are suffering low moods and more life drama due to Facebook … or is it really due to Facebook?!  Isn't it always the people who are responsible, not necessarily the program, or machine, or technology? For example, regarding addictions, the addictive tendency seems to be in the person and not the choice of addiction such as gambling or drugs. Thus the word responsibility is used in a positive fashion to help people take power over their lives and seek help. Someone recently commented on their Facebook status that they need AA for Facebook! So here are some contrarian ideas to stir your thinking, and that is my ultimate goal: to help you help yourself. No one has all the answers, but with a right mix from different sources we can all help in the solution process.  The key is to mix my ideas with someone else’s, and your own, and come to your own conclusions about what you want in YOUR life. Tony Robbins called this “Personal Power.” Make this a time when you take your Personal Power and live as you wish to live.  Rhianna sings: It's a thief in the night to come and grab you
It can creep up inside you and consume you
A disease of the mind, it can control you
It's too close for comfort.  Quite a unique way to describe a mental illness!  “Disturbia.” Many have felt disturbed while on Facebook. On one hand we have the comments and posts about how rotten life is and how someone cannot get a break (make a choice now and DELETE this poison from your life) and how we will all be dead by the end of 2013. If you decide to keep these people on your Facebook, do what I do and say a prayer for them: “Thank GOD I am ME and not living in their shoes.” If you continue to follow their posts and negative energy, we can bet that you will suffer Facebook Depression or some sort of low mood just by being influenced (putting those thoughts in your mind) by the words in front of you. On the other side of the coin are the Facebook posts that announce life is too perfect. We all know the reality: beauty is in the eye of the beholder and thus we must strive to see the good in all, even the adversities. These people have their moments of despair and sadness too; it’s just that they do not announce it to the world. Those who may suffer Facebook Depression are more than likely playing the game of the Jones’ and comparing themselves to others successes. When we compare ourselves to others, what our little competitive devil on the left shoulder (if you are left handed ) wants us to do, we will always play a losing game. We are not better or worse, just different. Why play those self-imposed games anyway? They are definitely a result of our egos seeking attention and drama … and ultimately pain.

Some people prefer to stay inside on the week nights and weekends and see what everyone else is doing - on Facebook. Is technology to blame? NO. Once again the answer lies in the problem – the people and their habits. Facebook does not suffer depression … Facebook does not even suffer recession, or compression or obsession or any other human-session. It is the people using Facebook (and other sociasl media), that have the challenges. A student once told me that “all problems are solvable if and when we go looking for solutions.”  So here are some ideas for consideration, to keep you healthy, on Facebook (or any other social-technology):

1. Ask yourself “Why am I on Facebook?” Be honest. Are you there for networking? Business? Family connection? Set your own parameters when you have the answer. I believe it is a great way to connect with the world, and the people we share it with. Of course we must be cautious while using Facebook, yet at the same time let others be and follow their own compass. Live YOUR life and your life only.
   
2. Do you spend too much time on Facebook. It is a great procrastination mechanism, so be careful in this regard.
   
3. Are you spending more time on Facebook than with your kids, family, significant others or friends? This is where technology can be dangerous, but once again it is the individual’s choice to spend time with loved ones or time “creeping” as it is called in Facebook language. The greatest gift we can give another, and ourselves, is time together.
   
4. While on Facebook, are you jealous/envious of others successes or how they look? Many will see this as an opportunity to shoot arrows at people and pick holes in their tapestry. I guess the idea that ‘by knocking someone else down we think we build ourselves up’ holds true in some people’s minds. However, this is a false idea. The law of sowing and reaping offers this gem of wisdom: we get what we set. Eventually we must sow positive seeds if we want positive results.
   
5. Be careful what pictures you post – they could end up anywhere! Set your privacy settings, especially this day in age, to protect you.
   
6. If you are a parent, limit your children’s time spent on Facebook. This holds true when statistics reveal that kids are significantly more obese and unhealthy than previous generations. I remember in my youth, playing street hockey until midnight sometimes as we had a street light under our playing area. Can anyone relate? Get your kids active as much as possible.  
   
7. Do not pay too much attention to people’s negative posts or read into them, especially if they are personal. Treat your energy like money and invest it wisely.
   
8. Use Facebook to keep in contact with people, especially family that are living away, and keep updated on their pictures. A picture is worth more than a thousand words!
   
9. Take personal responsibility and do not blame Facebook for anything. If you find it negative or “causing” you a period of low moods, remember it is your own perceptions, choices and actions that are really creating this. Change how you view and use Facebook.
   
10. See point #1 again – WHY are you using Facebook? The answer may reveal itself and solve some of your other problems.
    
11. If you do suffer what we have labelled Facebook Depression, then it may be time to seek professional help or delete your account and use your time in a much better fashion.

I hope these ideas have stirred some of your own ideas. Choose wisely and learn to follow your own compass. Facebook Depression seems like another way to label and blame something on the outside for what is really happening on the inside.  And depression is a part of like; seek help when the need arises ... and of course, everything (including Facebook) in moderation. 

Paul

HOOKED!!!!! Game on!

Age 12, and about to have a life-changing moment that has me hooked ever since.  Hope you enjoy this follow up book excerpt from yesterday!  What has got you "hooked" in your life?  Art, music, photography, constructing things, the galaxy, hunting, travel, museums?  It's time to do more of things you love and stop wasting life's precious moments.  Time to go "fishing" for what you really love to do.

pmw

Be Safe, Be Ready!

Skipper Bruce decided to put me on one path of least resistance, a tributary near the shore that looked like a perfect spot through which fish could swim.  It was safe for me to stand on the rocks instead of having to wade out into the turbulent current of the “weedy hole” as we used to incorrectly call it.  (The “weedy hole” is actually another pool further up the river.)  Skipper Bruce was very safety conscious in everything that he did.  “Always be safe,” he would say, “Because safety must be a top priority in life.”  How right he was in times when companies placed profits above employee safety.  Many times the employees lived in fear and did not stand up for themselves, thus making unsafe decisions.  Far too often, we see people make careless decisions costing them too much, sometimes the ultimate cost - life itself.  “Work hard, play hard, but, be safe” was a major component of Skipper Bruce’s daily philosophy. 

I stepped up near the river and was ready to cast my fly.  I remember the fly well.  It was a “thunder and lightning” pattern that we bought at the local drug store in Placentia.  It was a #6 hook, average size for Atlantic salmon, containing a moose hair wing, black body with a gold tinsel rib, a yellow tail and a combination of blue and orange feather fibers for the underside wing commonly called a “throat.” 

Having ensured my safety on the river bank, Skipper Bruce proceeded to fish the major river stem in the main pool.  As a new salmon angler, I was not efficient at casting the fly across the current.  Through years of experience, I have now learned that presentation is the most important part of Atlantic salmon fishing, unlike fly-fishing for trout, where presentation is usually not as important as the fly you are casting.  Trout take the fly for hunger or territorial purposes.  Some of my fishing colleagues refer to trout as “dumb fish”.  I disagree.  No fish, like no human being, can be labeled “dumb.”  No one really knows, however, why the Atlantic salmon rises to the river surface to take an artificial fly.  It is part of the mystery of life itself, but one can speculate that “fishy” instinct underlies this tendency. 

After six or eight casts in this flow of fresh water, my rod bent over like I had hooked into a Boeing 747, and my reel started to sing like a chainsaw on overdrive!  ZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzz!!!  I was looking away as this happened but my focus immediately shifted back to the splashing and jumping in front of me.  The fresh silvery torpedo had taken my fly unexpectedly and it proceeded to muscle down the river as if shot from a cannon!  Before I had a chance to yell to Skipper Bruce, he was rushing over to see what the commotion was.  The fish made one final springing leap and the fly line and leader came back and hit me in the face.  Fish #1 was gone, just like that!  As a rookie angler, I did not have time to lift my fly rod when the hook was set.  It was both upsetting and startling.  What a rush! 

That first presentation was, no doubt, a fluke.  Whatever I did to attract that fish it worked.  What excitement to have the feel of a leaping Atlantic salmon on the end of your rod, solidly hooked and fighting to be free!  Skipper Bruce estimated it to be seven or eight pounds, a far cry from the “big” half pound trout that we sometimes angled; and a far cry from the small pan-size “sardine trout” that my brother and father often brought home. J  That day I was “hooked” to a new activity that has taught me so much about life itself and all the twists and turns we each face on a daily basis.  Do you have such an activity that has changed your life?  Now is the perfect time to get hooked.  

Skipper Bruce and my new fly-fishing career!

Another piece of chapter 1 of Fishing For Reality.  It was a unique experience hooking my first ever Atlantic salmon at age 12 but the scene is set below...stay tuned for what actually happened on day 1 of my new fly-fishing career over 25 years ago! Wow...where does the time go?!

pmw

 

Childhood and Youth Memoirs

Mother Nature offers a place of peace and tranquility, away from the hustle and bustle of everyday life.  Those, who can relate, know what we mean by the term “the great outdoors.”  I have spoken to many retired individuals who claim that if they could do it all again, they would make more time for fun with nature, smelling the roses along the way.  There is something to be said about Mother Nature…and childhood. 

Amazingly we can remember childhood experiences when someone made us feel super special.  With my father working on the United States Naval Base (Argentia, Newfoundland and Labrador) as a civilian, and my mother a stay-at-home Mom helping to raise my brother and me, I was the perfect protégé for “Mr. Mike”, as many of the locals called him.   

Skipper Bruce was one of these extraordinary human beings who could “hook” anyone on his solid presence, dazzling personality, charisma, leadership and unusual kindness.  As a young boy of about five or six years old, I remember driving with him in his green Dodge car, as he revved up the engine saying to the slow drivers, “COME ON! Drive it or park it! Get out of our way!”  Of course, he did this for fun to impress me.  I liked it when his voice rose as if he meant serious business.  As safety was a major concept in his life philosophy I knew it was only for my amusement. 

Seatbelt on, I could barely see over the dash.  Away we went to our destination.  There we were in the real classroom of life, learning about the things that matter most.  I am certain that he learned, too, because he always commented that we learn best by experience and through teaching others.  Those that teach, learn best.  When we struggle to make something clear for another we help it make better sense for ourselves.  Skipper Bruce was rarely, if ever, stuck for the right words at the right time in helping someone. 

I vividly remember that day as if it were yesterday, when Skipper Bruce and I first decided to try fly-fishing for Atlantic salmon.  Being only twelve years old, I was ready for action.  While many of my friends in junior high school were wrapped up in their girlfriends and preliminary teenage temptation experiences, I was engrossed in my other classroom of learning with Mother Nature and, Skipper Bruce.  

In some areas of the world, a fly-fishing angler can use bait, lures, and other contraptions to fish Atlantic salmon.  In Newfoundland and Labrador where I grew up, it is “fly-fishing only”, as a means of conservation.  More importantly, I see it as the ultimate challenge, hooking and landing an often acrobatic Atlantic salmon on a fly rod.  The Atlantic salmon is anadromous.  As an adult it first spends its life in the ocean, feeding for survival and its journey ahead.  When Mother Nature calls, it arrives in its river of origin to pass on the ultimate gift for future salmon generations.  The Atlantic salmon lives in fresh and salt (sea) water during its life cycle, a unique combination for a life species. 

During those early years of fly-fishing adventures, many changes were happening in the salmon fishery in Newfoundland and Labrador, Canada.  Conservation measures were implemented and pressed on everyone to help prevent future extinction of the Atlantic salmon stocks.  Simultaneously, Mother Nature had her own agenda.  The rivers on the Avalon Peninsula of Newfoundland were often low and warm; often they were closed to fly-fishing.  Nevertheless, I kept my positive attitude toward my new sport, as Skipper Bruce had told me to do so, especially after our first attempt at the new adventure.

The Northeast River just outside of my hometown, Dunville, was a raging flood on our opening day.  We had our fly rods, salmon licenses, leader material to attach fly to fly line and, of course, our new selection of artificial Atlantic salmon flies.  Skipper Bruce took me to fish a section of the river where many youth, including me, would swim in the summertime.  There was a huge cliff on the other side of the river with trees overhanging, having been washed out from the torrential rain.  I remember swimming there as a teenager, doing jumps, belly flops and dives off the main rock.  On this day though, we meant business - fishing business that is. 

When we got to the river it was evident that Mother Nature had been at work because the river was extremely high and there were many tributaries.  Here salmon could swim more easily.  Oftentimes fish take the path of least resistance.  This is a life philosophy applicable to us all on occasion: when you must, take the path of least resistance. 

We Are All Searching...

...yes indeed and the search continues.  The title of this blog is the opening line of chapter 1 in my book Fishing For Reality.  There is an excerpt from chapter 1 below; please have a read and share if you find it helpful.  Not that I have much time to write these days, but I am making time as it helps people and they often enjoy reading what I have to say, as contrarian as it may be. 

It is 2013 and the age of ideas.  Some also call it generation O...for obese.  My goal: to share ideas and stimulate your thought processes to bigger and better things while enjoying the ride in your life ship.  Life is all about the "fishing" (and the life-lesson catching) and Skipper Michael Joesph Bruce, my grandfather, said it best to me all those years ago:  "The real ship you are leading is a ship called yourself!"  We cannot say it any better than that.  Happy 2013 and happy "fishing" :)

pmw (Paul Michael White)

 

Chapter 1-Hooked…on New Beginnings

Many go fishing all of their lives without knowing that it is not fish they are after.
   - Henry David Thoreau

We are all searching.  On a daily basis we are searching for: more of the next life experience, a better relationship and improved health, more financial freedom and happiness, better friends and associates, and anything that we think will make us happy and fulfilled.   Yes, I believe that we are all searching…for something.

This fast-paced world of instant access and globalization has people online shopping, online dating, online counseling and online seeking new, better and improved living.  The career and life search is a challenging phenomenon.  In psychology these days, we say “dust off your childhood” to find a hidden talent that you never knew existed.  I recently heard one professional speaker say that the happiest in society are those who went back and found some of their hidden talents and put these to work to craft a life of success and fulfillment.  It does not have to be a new career path but maybe a hobby to pursue part time.  Imagine earning a living at something you enjoy and do extremely well!  It makes sense, doesn’t it? 

Mother Nature offers a place of peace and tranquility, away from the hustle and bustle of everyday life.  Those who can relate know what we mean by the term “the great outdoors.”  I have spoken to many retired individuals who claim if they could do it all again, they would make more time for fun with nature, smelling the roses along the way.  There is something to be said about Mother Nature…and childhood.